Archive for the 'The Greater Good' Category

Almost Better than Bumper Stickers

Friday, June 26th, 2009

I have a couple of bumper stickers on my car.

One gives an 800 number for those with an unexpected pregnancy. There is also another sticker that says “Silence kills Babies – speak out against abortion”.

This is to send two messages – one gives the person something they CAN do. This is the 800 number.

The other sticker appeals to what seems to be a primarily male mindset that treats a unique genetic sequence, which is formed (read – new life) as the female egg is fertilized by the male sperm, as a piece of tissue. It attempts to shock the reader a bit.

I purposefully chose NOT to put the one that says Abortion is murder, though I believe that to be true. The reason being was not to continually remind mothers who have been conned into that of the guilt that it may bring up.

Here are the bumper stickers (42 hits). You can, of course, choose one less shocking.

Here is another action you can consider:
Rejoice Ministries Billboard

Although, I don’t agree with all their theology and such, much of what they say seems to be spot on.

Popularity: 17%

Would I walk out?

Thursday, June 18th, 2009

The italicized text below is from the online article at http://www.diarmani.com/Articles/Armani/Alternate%20Endings.htm (63 hits)

I find it interesting because as I get to know myself better and work on my problems, I wasn’t sure that if in the face of danger would I be one of the 7 mentioned in the article below, or in the group that walked out. In some respects, I have a similar time with what’s left of my marriage. Who are we really – I suppose we only know when put to the test.


Montreal Massacre: Alternate Endings

By Christopher di Armani

Gamil Gharbi single-handledly changed the face of Canadian gun politics. He became the embodiment of everything that man-hating feminists despise. In their horror and fear they lashed out at every Canadian male, and continue to do so today.

Someone said at the time, “The blood of these fourteen women are on the hands of every man”. Complete and utter garbage, but the national media lapped it up.

But what was the real problem in Montreal that fateful December day? Was it a lack of “gun control”? Not according to the Montreal Coroner Teresa Z. Sourour. She said quite clearly the exact opposite, not that anyone in government or the media noticed.

“The issue of firearms control has intentionally not been addressed. With the unlimited ammunition and time that Marc Lépine (Gamil Gharbi) had available to him, he would probably have been able to achieve similar results even with a conventional hunting weapon, which itself is readily accessible.”
Indeed it wasn’t until 2004, a full fifteen years after the event, that we were finally able to get the government to translate her report into English. (see diArmani.com for Ms. Sourour’s full report. [doc format])

Was it the failure of mental health officials? I doubt it. We did not have “thought police” in 1989 (and thankfully do not today either), and until this event, Mr. Gharbi apparently didn’t exhibit much in the way of abnormal psychology.

Was it the failure of police responding to the scene? Ms. Sourour said yes. I disagree. Sure, they formed a perimeter and sat outside waiting until Gharbi offed himself, but that is not the root cause of the high death toll.
The failure that day was with our manhood. Or more to the point, our lack of one. For thirty years or more, men had been “trained” to be obedient, to do what they’re told, to be more “feminine”, less “manly”.
So they did exactly what the lunatic with the gun said. They abandoned their sisters to a sure and horrific death.

They left the room.

I pray that the faces of those fourteen dead women haunt every single male who did as Gharbi ordered, every single night for the remainder of their spineless lives. They were there when it counted. They could have saved the lives of their fellow students and they chose not to. Shame on them all. They failed the woman, they failed themselves, and they failed Canada.

Let’s imagine, for a moment, two alternative endings to Montreal on December 6, 1989.

Let’s imagine that a single one of those men had the courage to say “No!”

Imagine if he had gathered his thoughts and his courage, and simply stormed Gharbi. Sure, he might have been shot, even killed. But his actions would have showed clear leadership, and surely one or two other men would have joined the battle. Gharbi would have been taken down in the very first classroom, with perhaps three or four wounded or dead.

That’s a far cry from 14 dead & 29 wounded.

But wait! you say, That’s never going to happen! Who in their right mind is going to confront an armed madman in a school shooting?

Nobody!

Are you sure?

Because there are 7 young men at the Thurston High School in Oregon who are living proof you are wrong.
Yes, the young man leading the counter-attack, Jacob Ryker, was shot multiple times. He didn’t let that stop him. He continued on until the man with the gun was disarmed, and he lived to tell about it. Not only that, he was awarded the highest honour in the Boy Scouts of America for his bravery and leadership. (http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/1998/08/11/national/main8610.shtml)

Now let’s look at another scenario, one that seems to disturb so many Canadians today.

Imagine our laws were different.

Imagine that, instead of doing their best to disarm every Canadian, our government believed in our inherent right to defend ourselves. Imagine they had the common sense and the decency to promote lawful concealed carry for any law-abiding citizen that can meet the same proficiency with firearms and use of force training as our police officers.

It’s not that difficult a threshold.

Had there been a single law-abiding citizen with a concealed handgun in Montreal’s l’Ecole Polytechnique that fateful day in 1989, the outcome would have been different. It would have been swift and effective.

Gharbi pulls his rifle out of his duffel bag and points it at someone. He might even get a shot or two off. Then some man or woman with the foresight (and the training) to carry would have stopped him dead.

We wouldn’t be holding candle-light vigils for fourteen dead women, believing that if we just blame enough men for the tragedy, it won’t happen again. The cold, brutal reality is so completely the opposite.

Look at every school shooting in North America and what do they all have in common? “Gun-Free Zones”. Every school has, as its published policy, no legal firearms permitted.

It didn’t help in Columbine. It didn’t help in Tabor. It didn’t help in Virginia Tech. It didn’t help in Dawson College. And it didn’t help in l’Ecole Polytechnique in 1989. Nor will it help the next time some unbalanced individual with a gun goes on a shooting rampage in the next “gun-free zone”.

The time has come to stop pretending we can light a candle to stop the violence. The time has come to focus on solutions that work.

Guaranteeing the death of our young people is not something we should be proud of, yet that is what we do every time we legislate another “gun-free zone”.

The only people who obey the rules are the law-abiding. People like you and me.

We do not walk into a school or a mall and start shooting people.

Yet we are the very people the state demands be defenseless in the face of evil.

It’s time that changed. It’s time our politicians paid attention to us and the real solution we offer.

It’s time concealed carry was made accessible again.

Yes, I said again.

It wasn’t so long ago that concealed carry was a realistic option in Canada, and obtaining a concealed carry permit wasn’t a big deal.

It’s already legal. The law is on the books. Our bureaucrats simply deny every application that doesn’t meet their “criteria”. (read every application)

Let’s tell our elected politicians we want them to take control of the unelected bureaucracy and make concealed carry accessible to ordinary Canadian Citizens.

Again.

Christopher di Armani is a freelance writer and filmmaker who resides in Lytton, BC, Canada, with his wife Lynda and their two dogs, Koda and Tuco.

Christopher can be contacted at christopher(at)diArmani.com or http://www.diArmani.com.

Popularity: 18%

Amazing Study from University of Wisconsin

Tuesday, June 9th, 2009

This is an amazing study from the University of Wisconsin’s National Survey of Family and Households.

They followed 645 couples who were extremely unhappy. Five years later they re-interviewed. What they uncovered was amazing.

AmericanValues.org, in its executive summary of this study, lists the following three conclusions that shocked so many.

1. Unhappily married adults who divorced or separated were no happier, on average, than unhappily married adults who stayed married. Even unhappy spouses who had divorced and remarried were no happier, on average, than unhappy spouses who stayed married. This was true even after controlling for race, age, gender, and income.

2. Divorce did not reduce symptoms of depression for unhappily married adults, raise their self-esteem, or increase their sense of mastery, on average, compared to unhappy spouses who stayed married. This was true even after controlling for race, age, gender, and income.

Here’s the best part…

3. About two-thirds of unhappy spouses who avoided divorce ended up happily married five years later. The unhappiest marriages experienced the most dramatic turnarounds: 78% of adults who said their marriages were very unhappy and who avoided divorce ended up happily married five years later.

These findings are very surprising in a culture that teaches us divorce is an easy way to end your problems quickly.

Popularity: 19%

Village School

Monday, April 27th, 2009

A friend of mine took this video of a school they are building somewhere in Africa:

Popularity: 13%

Way to Go Virginia!

Saturday, April 11th, 2009

Citing the article at http://christianpost.com/Society/Family_issues/2009/04/virginia-gov-approves-law-requiring-schools-to-teach-benefits-of-marriage-02/index.html
:

The Virginian governor has signed legislation requiring local schools to teach the benefits and value of marriage as part of the state Board of Education’s Family Life Education program.

Gov. Tim Kaine on Tuesday signed into law SB 827 and HB 1746, which broadens the range of topics covered by the family life education curriculum in grades K through 12 to include instruction on “the benefits, challenges, responsibilities, and value of marriage for men, women, children, and communities.”

The legislation was introduced by Senator Ralph Smith (R-22, Botetourt) and Delegate Brenda Pogge (R-96, Yorktown) based on the recommendation of The Family Foundation’s 2007-2008 Marriage Commission. The commission found that current requirements for the FLE program asked students to describe difficult family situations including financial problems, separation or divorce, injury or death, the loss of job and the birth of a baby.

The Commission recommended that the FLE guidelines be amended to require the teaching of the positive effects of marriage.

The legislation would help to reverse declining marriage and climbing divorce rates in the state, according to The Family Foundation president Victoria Cobb, who called it the group’s highest priority legislation supporting marriage.

On Wednesday, she sent an e-mail asking supporters to thank the governor for backing the law.

According to Brad Wilcox, professor of sociology at the University of Virginia and a member of The Family Foundation’s marriage commission, “Research shows that children who grow up in an intact, married family are about 50 percent less likely to experience serious psychological, academic, or social problems as children or young adults, compared to children who grow up in single or step-families.”

Kaine has also signed legislation that requires local school boards to better notify parents regarding what is being taught in Family Life Education so that parents can make a more informed decision about whether their kids should participate in that class.

Popularity: 17%

Kick the Dog

Wednesday, September 10th, 2008

1.) You wake up that morning. You are tired from the party the night before, but you have to go to work. As you leave for work, you kick the dog. What kind of day are you going to have?

2.) You wake up that mornng. You give thanks to God. Thank you. Thank you – Oh wonderful maker of this place! you go to work. What kind of day are you going to have?

What is going to happen to your mind in each case?

How to achieve option 2 each morning? I put signs on the mirror in my bathroom. I created a business card to keep in my wallet. I chose a symbol to remind me – a common one – a tree!

Some mornings are more difficult depending upon the cycles, but it helps. Practical eh?

Popularity: 18%

PAC

Tuesday, September 9th, 2008

I had seriously thought about becoming a marital and family therapist over the last year or so due to some of the experiences I have had lately.

Turns out in the State of Texas – that would mean at least a masters degree and about 1500 hours of supervised work, with another 1500 hours unsupervised. The masters degree would be about 40,000. Not too bad eh?

Thought about this some more…. why become a counselor? Ultimately, the objective is to somehow help lower the divorce rates at least here in the states, and promote the family unit and hopefully make this country less of the train wreck it is starting to become in my humble opinion. The way I see it, is that the break down of the family is the root cause behind many other societal issues. Yes there are problems elsewhere – but what is the root cause? The source?

One could argue that it is a lack of training that causes marriages to fail so easily, perhaps it is the ease of obtaining a marriage license? The ease in obtaining a divorce?

Now don’t get me wrong, I know you can’t legislate morality too much, but at the same time it sucks to see families getting ripped apart left and right and afterall – we do have laws against murder. I guess that in many ways my generation is the product of 3 or 4 generations of parents raising kids as kids and just doing the best we can. It has to turn around somewhere and start somewhere.

What is the model though – and why does it matter? I guess I still look at the prior to and including WWII generation as the model or ideal for how things should be done. That generation kicked a$$.

What does all this have to do with getting a degree in counseling? Well, I realized that again – that would not meet the bigger objective. The objective is to reduce the divorce rates. I need to think bigger. Bigger.

To heck with getting a degree. It’s Political Action Committee time.

Fathers Against Divorce (FAD)????? Nah too negative.

Better Husbands make Better Fathers and Less Divorce for the Future of the Family – too wimpy?

Father’s For the Family (FFF)?

Dads Against Divorce (DAD)?

Dad’s For Family (DFF)

Borrowing from the Life of Bryan..

The People’s Front for the Liberation of Judea?

The Popular People’s Front..

Not sure.

I think the FAD thing could become a FAD, but it is a bit negative and with all the Politically Correct crowd about it could do more harm than good.

As I think about such an organization though – there would have to be some built in policing to keep it from growing out of control and going too far. I could imagine some future scenario where it would be impossible to get a divorce from one’s spouse who is working as a prostitute due to the efforts of the FFF or FAD. That wouldn’t be good either.

Look at the ACLU for example. There was a time and place when it was great. Now, it is just out of control. The organization would need to have some sort of bylaws, that would allow the organization to scale down as the divorce rates or family started to succeed. Some guiding principles of sorts and a self terminating or reducing organization – once it has outlived it’s usefulness, it would ramp back down ideally.

Food For Thought (FFT).

Popularity: 16%

Protected: Father’s Against Divorce

Tuesday, September 9th, 2008

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Popularity: 16%

20 Dollar Bill

Wednesday, January 30th, 2008

This story is not to “build” myself up, but rather just to share what happened today.

I was in the car having a conversation with my boss about hypocrisy within the ranks of Christianity as it pertains to divorce to better explain why I believe it is right and good to stand for my marriage. As I stepped out of the car, almost no sooner had I said the word hypocrisy and elderly lady with a cane walks up – visibly hurting and disturbed. I feel that tug at my heart. I’m being tested. How hypocritical will I be? That longing to help her. I look into my wallet, but there is no cash. I politely explain and then that sting continues to torment my soul for being unable to help. Hypocrisy. My boss and I continued on our way and as he went inside I asked if I could go get her something to eat real quick. He said no problem.

I went up to her and told her I could buy her a subway sandwich, that was right across the way. She looked at me intently and said too salty – too salty several times. I was puzzled. I fought back the beggars can’t be choosers notion. I went back to my desk struggling with this and put on stop divorce radio. How do I help her? How do I help her? It started talking about Nehemiah rebuilding the city wall of Jerusalem and then a flash of inspiration hit me. Of course, there is an ATM machine right across the way…. I got up from my chair….. and removed my head phones. Help the poor were the last words that came on the radio… They echoed in my ears as I was running down stairs praying that she would still be there..  and for God to forgive the temporary hardness of my heart.  I went and pulsed some cash $20, $2 fee.

Where is she? Where is she? I let my ummm instincts do the driving….. I walked a block and a half and found her standing underneath a tree. I handed her the cash and just said God loves you – and you’ll get out of this some day – maybe not today, but I know you can do it. She started crying – I could tell she was deeply deeply wounded inside. Felt her pain. I stood there and lived through it with her as much as I could. Oh thank you thank you thank you she said. As I left, I felt a tear run down my eye.

The Kingdom. Hypocrisy.

Popularity: 28%

Dueling Banjos

Friday, January 18th, 2008

I used to play guitar once upon a time. Wasn’t very good at, but I could play many tunes, and read sheet music well enough to impress my mom and my girlfriend in high-school (my wife).

Sister Mary Ann was her name. I started music lessons in 6th or 5th grade .. and went on through about my Junior year. Even learned to play the big bass for our church during mass. You ever try to chew gum and pat your tummy at the same time? Wiggle you ear maybe? Raise one eyebrow? Well, I was that guy who could play the tunes but would always lock my lips up into some expression of nervousness as I played. Eventually I got out of it. Anyway, at one point I decided I wanted to learn how to play dueling banjos. There was a problem though.. I didn’t have a banjo. So I asked my music teacher to setup an arrangement for guitar. Kind of funny really, I learned to play dueling banjos against myself on the guitar – just one guitar. Obviously, that song could not be taken to its logical conclusion of reaching the end of the song on only one guitar. Sound familiar? That doesn’t mean I didn’t try though!
You know this song – it is fun … try this in your head to the first few notes of Dueling Banjos..

Bat a ding deng ding dang ding dong ding.

I could keep myself entertained for hours doing that. Making music with your mouth is so fun. Other things aren’t  so fun, but the thing to realize is that I’m not in charge. God is. He may be spanking me and my wife both – or just me. At the end of the day though, there is a destination… he may run me and her through the desert awhile, but it all has a purpose. To teach. Will we learn this time? Will I?
That’s where I’m at now. God has a plan for this somehow. I feel like I’m being trained and so is she – possibly even awakened or both of us. I have a dream now. I want to stand up before insurmountable odds – in a culture that places way too much emphasis on abandoning marriage as soon as something bad happens.
So what do I do during the interim as I be still and wait? Well, while I’m waiting for God to bless me… I must bless someone else.  Idle time = Devil’s hands.

This is not to celebrate the self, but is to give you other guys some ideas.

1.) I’ve subscribed to prayer lists – to pray for other people in dire straits.

2.) I’ve adopted a couple of starving Brazilian and African children.

3.) Found an organization that supports starving children in Israel.

Popularity: 20%